Excerpts from my life, Uncategorized

Bestow

When I read today’s prompt from WordPress, the first thing that struck me is that how many times have I read this word in the Magnificent Qur’an!

The multiple times Allah has reminded us of how much He has bestowed up on us. The reminders of not hiding the bestowed like a miser and giving away to the needy generously. The promise of eternal abode in Jannah to the obedient…

Like a weak woman, I have been through moments of thanklessness too. The question “why has so and so hardship dawned on me..” has crossed my mind too. Yet, truth is merely seconds away. Despite all harms, I crib in a safe home, a kitchen stacked with food, a family who cares, source of rizq to provide for myself and a body free of diseases. That, is A LOT to be grateful for.

In my ‘keyword’ search, I found the true definition of success..

Remember the graces bestowed so that you are successful..

And I remembered the blessing of being guided into the true faith.. the blessing of receiving the message through Allah’s messenger (salallahu alayhi wasallam)

Allah says in Surah Al-A’raf 7:69:

“Do you wonder that there has come to you a Reminder (and an advice) from your Lord through a man from amongst you that he may warn you? And remember that He made you successors after the people of Nuh (Noah), and increased you amply in stature. So remember the graces (bestowed upon you) from Allah, so that you may be successful.”

Truly, its really a very huge reminder. Allah asks us whether we wonder that there has come to us a Reminder and advice from Allah, through His messenger (salallahu alayhi wasallam) ..

This statement stirred something inside me. Made me feel very sorry for my state of mind. A guilt, that how I have repeatedly failed to treat the word of Allah with the treatment it deserves. And it makes me feel worse for those who are completely devoid of it. I know how empty life feels without it. Aimless, headless and meaningless stride towards man made goals which once attained leave you with a life of no worth.

Al-A’raf 7:23

قَالَا رَبَّنَا ظَلَمْنَآ أَنفُسَنَا وَإِن لَّمْ تَغْفِرْ لَنَا وَتَرْحَمْنَا لَنَكُونَنَّ مِنَ ٱلْخٰسِرِينَ\n

They said: “Our Lord! We have wronged ourselves. If You forgive us not, and bestow not upon us Your Mercy, we shall certainly be of the losers.”

And then I read this…

Allah says in Surah Al-An’am 6:165:

And it is He Who has made you generations coming after generations, replacing each other on the earth. And He has raised you in ranks, some above others that He may try you in that which He has bestowed on you. Surely your Lord is Swift in retribution, and certainly He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.

I knew this. I have read this before. But when I read it again, suddenly 80% of everything that my life comprises of started making sense. They all fell into place. But I know, my mind is feeble. This sense of serenity, solitude, connection, reflectiveness and all the mixed bag of good emotions within me now will last for some time. Some time until I drench into worldliness again..

And then the raw truth of how lonely my soul is. No beloved of mine can intercede for me and cover up except by Allah’s permission. Am I ready for this proximate interaction with my Master. To face Him all by myself. Am I even worthy? What a insignificant creation I am! In a world full of his marvels…I find myself smaller than a speck of dust.. May Allah protect me and you from humiliation on the Final Day

Allah says in surahAl-An’am 6:94

And truly you have come unto Us alone (without wealth, companions or anything else) as We created you the first time. You have left behind you all that which We had bestowed on you. We see not with you your intercessors whom you claimed to be partners with Allah. Now all relations between you and them have been cut off, and all that you used to claim has vanished from you.

And then, i read this. Amongst all the warnings and reminders my Lord has also told me that I can seek my own welfare..for my own good. How my tiny, feeble heart shatters to recite this.. what are we without His mercy?

Al-A’raf 7:23

قَالَا رَبَّنَا ظَلَمْنَآ أَنفُسَنَا وَإِن لَّمْ تَغْفِرْ لَنَا وَتَرْحَمْنَا لَنَكُونَنَّ مِنَ ٱلْخٰسِرِينَ

They said: “Our Lord! We have wronged ourselves. If You forgive us not, and bestow not upon us Your Mercy, we shall certainly be of the losers.”

I don’t know why, I suddenly remembered the story of the people of Kahf. How Allah’s mercy saved them from the corruption of this world and granted them the best for their Akhirah. Hope..

It’s never too late. Even if we are at the lowest low at this moment, we can still change. It is never about competing but it definitely is about improving ourselves for Allah’s sake. To tread a path, no matter how small a step it is, consistently towards Allah.

Al-Anfal 8:53

That is so because Allah will never change a grace which He has bestowed on a people until they change what is in their ownselves. And verily, Allah is All-Hearer, All-Knower.

And the promise of Allah of a good end.. that the efforts and the hardships is always worth it. So many times you will read it in the Qur’an and every time it makes you want to try just one more time hoping for the best end..

Ar-Ra’d 13:22

And those who remain patient, seeking their Lord’s Countenance, perform As-Salat (Iqamat-as-Salat), and spend out of that which We have bestowed on them, secretly and openly, and defend evil with good, for such there is a good end;

He has given us a lot. And we never had to pay a penny. There is no price ever demanded , just bounties of rewards in exchange of good deeds always promised. How hard is it to recognise His favours and be grateful? Till when will we live in denial?

An-Nahl 16:55:

So (as a result of that) they deny (with ungratefulness) that (Allah’s Favours) which We have bestowed on them! Then enjoy yourselves (your short stay), but you will come to know (with regrets).

#Daily Prompts <a href=”Bestow“>Bestow

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Excerpts from my life

A Good Word.

Stories of getting betrayed by loved ones are very popular. Each one of us will be able to recall at least one person who deeply hurt us, but we never expected him (or her) to. But has the converse ever happened? That you get warmth and affection from a source you least expected?

Come on. Think harder. I am sure you must have come across that one stranger who helped you without demanding any return. A kind word that soothed, or a generous smile that healed. An acknowledgement of your hard work or a good pat to do better next time.

Just as I write this, comes in my mind my ex-househelp. Let’s address her as Suman. It was way back in 2014, when I was living alone in a city, had newly started practising Islam and was struggling emotionally. A revert sister, after having read my blog, had come to visit me for a short period as my guest. Let’s address her as Aminah. I don’t know how I struck a warm chord with Suman back then. She was a non-Muslim, and a victim of domestic violence. We often sat together for a cup of tea on weekends when I was not rushing to my workplace. Sometimes we discussed Islam, sometimes her hardships and sometimes thoughts of a hopeful future.

I introduced Aminah, as my ‘elder sister’ to her. So, when I was not around these two would spend sometime together at home. Just the day before Aminah was supposed to leave, Suman insisted that we do not make anything for supper that night. That evening, she came down all the way from her home and handed us a delicious meal of spiced okra (bhindi masala) and Bajra rotis. I remember the first thoughts we had when we opened her container. We were doubtful as to why would she be so warm towards us? It was a gesture too kind for someone who washes dishes in other’s homes. Now when I look back, it makes me realise that kindness and affection have no barriers. Four years and her generosity has stayed.

Recently, my mother in law and I were sitting together. It took me a while to get comfortable around her. Even now, it is perhaps 70% comfort, the remaining will take a few more years I guess. That’s how it is with mother in laws and daughter in laws (Speaking of kind and good women with Taqwa). They are two women from different backgrounds, lifestyle and for us even different culture. She comes from a North Indian state wherein I am from the East Coast. It took me some efforts to be able to understand her over these two years and I am sure, there has been a lot of efforts from her end too.

So, this fine day, she asks me about my parents’ well-being. Whether they are fine and comfortable at their places. How they are managing their things alone etc. My parents have two daughters and as happens in such cases, they’re living alone after both of us got married. Then my mother in law (Ammi) says something beautiful:

-“In future, when you want to look after your parents, never assume that Ammi will object to it or dislike it. I would rather be happy and supportive. You can keep them at your house, if it is difficult then you may keep them in my house too. I will truly enjoy their company and have tea with them in evenings. Never think twice about my opinion or the society. Rather, I will be very proud of you and present this as an example to everyone on how daughters can also look after parents. Irrespective of whether they become Muslims or not, you should bring them to you.”

It choked me. I am a very nonchalant person. It is rare that I am unable to hold my emotions before people. But it was one of those rare moments. It is hard to explain anyone my rapport with my parents. It is definitely not smooth but again, affection and concern exists. It is often that I worry about their oldage, which will be dawning soon on them. These words coming from my mother in law, shed a 100 bricks from the heart. I guess, it changed my way of looking at her forever and definitely raised her status in my heart.

I’ve always had in my mind to write a post on how she and I developed a good rapport despite the many differences we have in our lives. But, I shall do it only after I complete four to five years of my wedding (In Sha Allah) because I want to observe how she and I evolve over the years. In India, this relationship perhaps has more intricacies than the husband-wife relationship. Needs careful planning, observation and patience. And, it is not possible unless both are willing to strike an accord.

Words heal. Just as words harm. Around us, we will find several people whom we can ease merely by spending some positive time with them. Or maybe by lending a ear. A kind gesture can make someone’s day. Does not take much. We women, need to get over topics that include clothes, gatherings, food or television. Let us be beneficial women. Let people around us benefit from us. Remind them of Allah and show them the way to lead a life that pleases Allah. A life that is closely connected to the Qur’an. How else will the society change for the better unless women take charge of it?

~~~~~~~

“So remind, if the reminder should benefit.” [Qur’an, 87:9]

Al-Bukhari and Muslim narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him speak good or else keep silent …” 

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) commanded us to control our tongues in more than one hadeeth, such as that narrated by al-Tirmidhi from ‘Uqbah ibn ‘Amir (may Allah be pleased with him) who said: “I said, ‘O Messenger of Allah, what is salvation?’ He said, ‘Control your tongue, keep to your house and weep over your sin.’” Classed as saheeh (authentic) by al-Albani. 

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Excerpts from my life

Guidance.

I am at my grandma’s place. I feel jealous. Jealous of those who have Muslim families. Whose grandparents at least died uttering the shahadah. I am jealous of those who have practising parents. Who gave them  tarbiyah to be a good Muslim. Did you ever realise, that even when you were not practising, even on the days you didn’t pray salah, when you ever thought of God it was always Allah. If you ever have to beg before someone, it was always Allah.;

At least you knew His name. At least you knew there is some miraculous book of His. You always knew about the Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam)

It is a different story here. If we tell them there is only one God, they ask “which one” .. Each day starts with shirk. The temple priest is a snob and everyone hates him but he has to be respected by everyone. I can’t stand his tobacco stained teeth.

I sometimes wonder whether I should get on the top of a mountain(here rock) and declare about Islam how the Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam) did. Whether I should break the idols of the temple like Ibrahim (as) did. Whether I should have a direct talk with the priest. Or what else should I do.

No matter what I speak to the women here, goes unheard. My blabbering about The Creator and everything else being creations. About Tawheed. Akhirah. The idols being lifeless. Trees and sun being creations. They agree and the next morning I find them back to the same routine. As if not a thought was spared about what I said for a moment. As if it was just another gossip session.

They are not even literate for me to give away books. Males are a degree above vain. It pains to see their life. Their lifestyle is way tougher than the life in city. Women are working all day long. People eat five meals a day. They are cleaning their houses, washing and ironing clothes, cutting chopping cooking, separate schedule for temple stuff, serving in laws, raising brats, tendering cattles, filling water in containers… They slog from 6am till 9pm. They are just on and on and on. To top it, there is a fast or festival every 5th day where they have to do all this without food. They have restrictions in folding also. There is a list of things they cannot eat simply because they are married.

Waste. All a waste. Aimlessly doing things just because this is what women do in the village. Their simplicity, their goodness..will they be of any use? Only Allah knows. The prettiest bride, the most educated of them, the best and the worst person, each one has the same routine.

At times I am mum. At times I discuss things with them. How is it even supposed to happen in five days? How will guidance reach them when I live 2000 kms away. At times this question haunts me: Should I live in a Muslim dominated place where my imaan is secure. Where I am surrounded with opportunities to gain ilm and practice Islam freely with ease. Or should I give up this privilege and settle here to work on my people. What is more important?

Indeed, guidance is from Allah alone. His plans and His ways are matters we will never know or understand…

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IOU Assignments- informations., Islam

Kibr-A Barrier for the Student of Knowledge

KIBR- A Barrier for the Student of Knowledge

Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem

 

Refined manners suit a student of knowledge. Etiquette of a student of knowledge includes :

 

  • Forbearance: that he is not reckless or quick to retaliate
  • Abstinence
  • Patience with common folk
  • Submission to truth and
  • Expecting reward from Allah alone (Ibn Uthaymeen).

 

Whoever Allah wishes good for, He gives him knowledge of deen. Therefore, students of knowledge must acknowledge this blessing (Muhammady, 2015)

 

Lower your wing of humility to Allah

A person setting out to gain knowledge should know that it is a form of worship. His heart must be flood with desire of gaining Allah’s pleasure and humble submission towards Him. This, will make him amongst the honorable ones in both worlds (bin-Baaz, 2014). Slightest pride leads to rejection of worship (Ibn-Hanbal, 2014).

 

In a narration of Abu Dawood, Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam) states that a person who seeks knowledge for materialism rather than to see the face of Allah shall not smell the fragrance of paradise.

 

Kibr that openly opposes and negates Eemaan results in the banishment of the one who holds it from entering al-Jannah as is found in Allaah’s statement:

“And your Lord said: “Invoke Me, I will respond to your (invocation). Verily! Those who scorn (yastakbiroon – Have kibr) My worship, they will surely enter Hell in humiliation!” [Surah Ghaafir: 60]

A form of humility before Allah is to fear him and establish Tawheed. Allah promises the muttaqeen forgiveness and great reward. Some salafs termed fear of Allah as absolute knowledge. Ibn Masood (radiallahu anhu) stated that fear of Allah suffices as ilm whereas absence is sufficient ignorance. Possession of ilm is proportional to taqwa. Indeed, Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam) was the most fearful of Allah with the maximum taqwa (Bukhari).

 

 

Make du’aa for ‘ilm:

Allah promises that He will respond to calls of his servant. To the lowest heaven He comes each night in the last one-third to respond to our supplications (Bukhari)

 

Ibn Tayyimah used to supplicate by pleading, ““O teacher of Ibraaheem, teach me! O educator of Sulaymaan, grant me understanding!”.

 

Allah commanded Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam): “…and say:, ‘My Lord! Increase me in knowledge’” (TaHa, 114). Even Ibrahim (alayhis salam) made dua for ilm and righteousness (Ash-shuara, 83).

 

Lower the wing of humility to creation

The ulama are the inheritors of knowledge from Prophets. Humility before them is essential. Allah warns us how Shaytaan works from all directions to make us amongst the thankless (Al-Araf, 17). 

 

Kibr is a disease of tyrants (Ibn Uthaymeen). Arrogance and tawheed cannot harvest in the same soul. Feeling superior for performance of any act of worship represents lack of taqwa and understanding of Allah’s asma was-sifaat. We are reminded of how Qarun, when boasted about being wealthy owing to his ilm, was swallowed by the earth under Allah’s command (Al-Qasas, 76-78).

 

A kind of kibr is to despise the people, and to look down upon them. This attitude arises when a person is amazed with his own self, thinks highly of himself, and thinks he is better than others. So this causes him to have kibr towards the creation, despise them, mock them, and to degrade them through both speech and action (As-Sa’di). Allaah’s Messenger sal-Allaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam said:

“It is enough evil for a person to despise his brother Muslim.” (Sahih Muslim)

 

A true student of knowledge has reverence of Allah’s greatness and knows nobody can match it. Thus, he mellows down knowing that our esteem comes from none than other Allah(Ibn-Khamis).

 

 

Humility of Scholars

Abu Bakr (radiallahu anhu), the best man after Prophets, made du’aa that Allah makes him better than what people perceive him to be, that Allah does not make him accountable for their words and that he is forgiven for things they are not aware of. This du’aa swelled Shaikh Albanee when he was praised by a brother and he broke down saying that he was merely a student of knowledge (Abu Yahyaa).

 

Abdullah ibn-Umar (Radiallahu anhu) was renowned for his knowledge and piety. He was always cautious of what came out of his tongue. He narrated hadiths of Rusool Allah only if he was confident of remembering every bit of it

 

Musab bin Umayr (radiallahu-anhu), was from an affluent family but his humility reflects when he chose to give up his wealth for imaan. The Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam) chose him to be the first ambassador of Islam, to Yathrib. When the chief of the tribe came with fury to shoo them away, Musab instead of retaliating, humbly offered him to listen. He suggested that he may leave if he does not like what Musab and the Prophet had to say. It was a result of this poise, that the chief along with Sa’ad bin Muad and the entire tribe accepted Islam

 

The four imaams have been known to not treat their words are the final line. Imam Hanifa, did not allow his students to write down his teachings lest he may change his opinion in future. Imam Malik was wary of making his jurisprudence the law of the state during Umayyid dynasty. Nor did he ever haste to speak on matters he had no knowledge of. Imam Sha’fie also gave in to the fact that there will be many hadith that will be known after him. Thus, he gave preference to the word of Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam) as well. 

 

The Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam)

Allah (azza wajal) commanded Prophet (Salallahu alayhi wasallam) to lower his wings and show his gentleness to the believers (Ash-Shuara, 215).

 

The Prophet (salallahu alayhi wasallam) was an epitome of humility. We have narrations where he would sit on the ground, lick his fingers after eating and ride donkeys. He established being humble as his sunnah and who is a better muslim than he who follows the sunnah of Rusool Allah.

 

He (salallahu alayhi wasallam) would walk down to meet those who were sick. His heart would melt to see the impoverished in distress. So much that he addressed to treat slaves as brothers put under our control by Allah. Kids would climb upon him when he would pray and he would be patient. When he sat with his companions, he looked like a commoner such by-passers had to inquire who Muhammad was from amongst them.

 

He (salallahu alayhi wasallam) prayed the salah of janazah for a destitute black woman who looked after the mosque. He would accept the most meager invitations and would greet children. A freed slave-woman wanted to divorce her slave-husband trespassing the Prophet’s advice and Rusool-Allah accepted her choice.

 

He would not hesitate to move dust and do works of labour with those lesser in status so as to help them. He (salallahu alayhi wasallam) ate as the servant ate, he sat as the servant sat. That was how he address himself as- a servant. 

 

CONCLUSION (Kibr- A barrier to Paradise)

 

From ‘Abdullaah Ibn Mas’ood radi-Allaahu ‘anhu who related that Allaah’s Messenger sal-Allaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam said:

Whoever has an atoms worth of kibr (pride) in his heart will not enter Paradise.” So a man said: What about a person who loves (i.e. takes pride in) wearing beautiful clothes and beautiful shoes? So he replied: “Indeed Allaah is beautiful and loves beauty. Kibr (pride) is to reject the truth, and to despise the people.”

 

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IOU Assignments- informations., Islam

The Divorce: Part 1

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Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem.

I remember watching a teleshow long back where a muslim man uttered “talaq” thrice and his wife became the damsel in distress. The child in me was abhorred. My heart went out for all muslim women and I felt proud to be born in a hindu household. At least my dad will never do that to my mum.

That is how media is teaching us about Islam today. The sad part is that not only non-Muslims, even Muslims today are resorting to media to learn about Islam. The result? We see a widespread debate over triple talaq today. What surprises me, is the Indian courts and non-muslim public says that triple talaq is cruel, whereas many promiment people from amongst the muslim are striving to upkeep this practise.

Why? why are we in such a miserable situation? Why are we taking religion from any other source other than Qur’an and hadith? Why amidst all the chaos, the one place you forgot to check about the Islamic laws was the Qur’an? May Allah ease the affairs of the ummah.

Subhanallah, our local masjid here has been delivering khutba every jumu’ah on women’s rights in Islam. They have beautifully covered how women open doors to Paradise for her parents, husband and children. Previous jumu’ah the topic was the very controversial issues of talaq, iddat and halala.

Pre-Islamic times witnessed divorce being used as a tool for harassing women. The men would divorce women and then would take them back soon after. Neither did they allow the women to live peacefully post divorce, nor did they look after them after taking them back.

It was under these circumstances that Allah revealed the divine laws of divorce. Women were given the right of khula and men received the right of talaq. Allah says in the Qur’an:

الطَّلَاقُ مَرَّتَانِ ۖ فَإِمْسَاكٌ بِمَعْرُوفٍ أَوْ تَسْرِيحٌ بِإِحْسَانٍ ۗ

Divorce is twice. Then, either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment. [Surah Baqarah, 229]

Thus, the matter of divorce was made more grave and recurrence of it to trouble women was stopped.

Two Roads to Choose:
Allah then commands the Prophet (صلي الله عليه وسلم) and through him the entire ummah, that when they divorce their wives, they must not rush by not adhering to the commandments of Allah (Surah At-Talaq, 1).

Allah says, when the iddat is coming to an end, a man may take two ways-

  • He may either leave her so that she is free to live her life and marry someone else if she so wishes or,
  • He may choose to get back with her and amend the marital ties.

Thus, if he decides to take her back he must do with due respect and dignity. A person who takes her back to oppress her is indeed a zaalim and will receive great humiliation from Allah (subhana wa ta’ala). Similarly, if he decides to leave her, he has been commanded to leave her with due kindness without causing any humiliation or abuse. To maintain clarity in the matter of divorce or reconciliation, Allah has advised to take two men of repute as witnesses (Surah At-Talaq, 2). .

To Joke about divorce:
It has been recorded in At-Tirmidhi [1] that the messenger of Allah (صلي الله عليه وسلم) said that there are three things which when joked about become binding on the speaker

  • To joke about nikah
  • To joke about divorce
  • To joke about taking back ones wife.

Some narrations from sahabis including Umar and Ali (radiallahu anhum) say the three things are nikah, divorce and manumission.

Allah prohibits us from joking about the verses of Qur’an (Surah at-Tawbah, 65-66) and to denounce a gathering where it is done (Surah an-Nisa, 140). Therefore nobody can perform a nikah, consummate the marriage and declare the next day that he was joking. The woman he married, will nevertheless will be called his wife. Similarly, one cannot pronounce divorce and say that he was joking. Divorce is a matter that must be taken seriously keeping the consequences in mind.

The Procedure of Talaq aka a bit about Triple Talaq

Ibn Abbas (radiallahu anhu) reported that pronouncements of three divorce during the lifetime of Allah’s messenger (صلي الله عليه وسلم)  and of Abu Bakr and two years of the caliphate of Umar (radiallahu anhum) was treated as one. However, after that people started giving talaq frivolously. Thus, to curb this trend, Umar imposed upon them to treat three talaq in one breath as an irrevocable divorce  (Sahih Muslim). Additionally, it is interesting to note that Abdullah Ibn Masud and Zubayr (radiallahu anhum) advised Umar bin Khattab against this.

Similar narrations by Abu Sahba (radiallahu anhu) has been recorded in Muslim. The irony of the day is that Muslims choose to ignore the trend during the time of Prophet (صلي الله عليه وسلم) . Do you and I know better about those times than Ibn Abbas (radiallahu anhu)? The ruling of triple talaq at one go was merely imposed for exceptional circumstancial necessity of that age.

It has been recorded in Musnad Ahmed, that Rukana once came distressed to the Prophet stating that he had divorced his wife but regretted it. The Prophet (صلي الله عليه وسلم) asked him how he had divorced her. He said he by pronouncing three divorces in one setting. Thereby, the Prophet told him that he may take his wife back as this will amount to just one utterance of divorce and Rukana did so [3].

Another narration by Mahmud bin Labid states that a man uttered divorce thrice to his wife in one sitting. When the messenger of Allah (صلي الله عليه وسلم) heard this, he angrily stood up saying, “the Book of Allah is being made the subject of jest while I am still amongst you”. A man immediately stood up seeking permission whether he should kill that man. [4]

Hence, the triple talaq in one sitting is called talaq-ul-bidaat — an innovation that is against the procedure prescribed by Allah. Therefore, between every talaq there must be a waqf (i.e a period of iddah). Any number of pronouncements at one time would sum up to one pronouncement.

Women must be divorced during the prescribed period. Muslim recorded that Ibn-Umar (radiallahu anhu) reported that he divorced is wife while she was menstruating. Umar bin Khattab asked the Messenger (صلي الله عليه وسلم) about it and this angered the Prophet. He commanded ibn-Umar to take her back and divorce her when she is clean from it. When she again enters menstruation and is clean from it again, he may divorce her again.  However, the condition is that he must not have had intercourse with her during that period. After this he may keep her or divorce her for the final time. [5]

There is also a similar narration on the same lines in Sahih Muslim where Prophet (صلي الله عليه وسلم) continues to say that if he pronounced three talaq at one and the same time, he has disobeyed the command of Allah with regards to the procedure of divorce. But, she would be ultimately separated from him.

Another narration from Daraqutni states that Ibn-Umar asked the messenger of Allah (صلي الله عليه وسلم)whether it would be permissible for him to take his wife back if he had pronounced three divorces. The Prophet responded that the talaq would be complete and irrevocable but ibn-Umar would have earned the sin for pronouncing divorce in the wrong manner [6].

To be continued…

In the next part we will learn what Qur’an says about the period of iddat, kindness prescribed for divorced women and the process of halala In sha Allah. Click here to read Part 2.



Reference

[1] At-Tirmidhi, 1184. Graded hasan by shaikh Albani

[2] Saheeh Muslim, Book 9 hadith number 3491 (Book on Talaq, Chapter 2: Prouncement of three divorces)

[3] ‘Usmani, Umar Ahmad, (1999),  Women’s Rights in the Qur’an, Women and Modern Society, Indian: Select Books

[4] An-Nasa’i, taken from Commentary to Surah Baqara verse 229 from Tafseer Ibn Katheer

[5] Saheeh Muslim, Book 9 hadith no. 3473 (Book on Talaq, Chapter 1: Prohibition of divorcing wife during her menses)

[6] Taken from commentary on Saheeh Muslim, Book 9 hadith number 3491

Bibliography
1.
Tafseer ibn Katheer
2. As-Sa’di, Abdur-Rahmaan , (2014), Methodical Interpretation of the Noble Qur’an: Tafseer as-Sa’di, vol 10., Riyadh: Darussalam
3. Muslim, (2005), Sahih Muslim, Translated by Abdul Hamid Siddiqui, Vol. 2, India: Islamic Book Service

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my journey as a revert muslimah

Ramadan Memoirs of an Indian Revert

Originally posted in MeMuslima

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Sawm, one of the pillars of Islam. It took me a while to turn and come to Islam, to actually understand the essence of every religious act that we do. My heart fills as I see my journey step by step. It is an overwhelm of emotions.

As a sixteen year old, Ramadhan, for me was fasting of the stomach. I was ignorant enough to corelate it with the fasting that pagans do- fasting by stomach only, fasting without having God in the ambit, fasting in exchange for something or partial fasting. I remember being excited about it as if it was a new adventure for me. I never woke up for suhoor. Yes, never…

To view original click here

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my journey as a revert muslimah

A Step at a Time

Bismillahir Rahmaanir Raheem.

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As salamu alai kum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

Ramadhan is here! Yes, I too am excited like you. Ramadhan last year was a learning experience for me. It changed me a lot as a muslimah. Subhanallah. This month last year, healed me. For I know, I overcame depression with the help of Allah (subhana wa ta’aala) alone. It is hard to believe that a year has gone by and I still hold that month so close to my heart. Very often, I look back and feel thankful for having gained so much in this year. Indeed, closeness to Allah (subhana wa ta’aala) is what I am most thankful for. Isn’t it a mercy in itself that you are able to comprehend His (subhana wa ta’aala) blessings?

Say: O My servants who have transgressed against their own souls, despair not of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Most Forgiving, Most Merciful. (Surah az-Zumar 39:53) 

Soon after Ramadhan, I joined my workplace in August. A new place embarked the beginning of me as a hijabi. You may read about how I started wearing the hijab here. Though I was very unhappy when I had joined, I left as a happy person. I resigned in February to come back home thereafter. As time passed, I realised perhaps that office was the best place for me to start my journey as a new Muslim. Not every place has people as accepting and welcoming. This place gave me confidence, which served a foundation for me to walk out in an Islamic attire.

It was in that Ramadhan that I started writing. For a person who used to write a story annually only because my father pushed us (my sister and me) to write for a local magazine, it is hard to believe that she wrote regularly for almost a year. Alhamdulillah! All good is from Allah (subhana wa ta’aala).

Everything has a purpose. My sister and I detested writing for those magazines; and after she left for higher education, she pretty much stopped writing. Alhamdulillah, however due to the advent of internet, I could not escape. The editor till date mails me a month before the magazine’s release to contribute. Had they not brushed me all these years, I would never have even remotely wanted to pen down my thoughts. It truly awes me when (by the mercy of Allah), I find a flow of thoughts and ideas in my head at any point of time. I remember taking weeks to even come up with a single idea annually (framing it was another affair)!

Little did I know that I would come such a long way. In this year that passed, I met sisters and friends so close to my heart. It is funny that I used to think myself to be the only revert to Islam in India. This notion too was removed, and slowly in my life dripped in like raindrops beautiful revert sisters. Alhamdulillah, all of them are so much in love with Allah and are truly striving towards Him. Then, I also came across a few sisters who were born into the deen but are struggling against cultural barriers to stand by the truth.

Verily, you (O Muhammad) guide not whom you like, but Allah guides whom He wills. And He knows best those who are the guided.”

[Al-Qasas, 28:56]  

Each one’s story is an inspiration. It is indeed amazing how Allah (subhana wa ta’aala ) turns His slaves towards Himself and how once His slave falls in love with Him, nothing on earth seems better than Al Wadud, The Most Loving. From amongst these sisters, I got the opportunity to meet a few. The excitement of spotting that girl in hijab and running to embrace each other is an absolute high! We spoke as if we are meeting for the hundreth time, wherein it was just the first. As time passed, gradually, we learnt together, laughed together, cried together and continue to be inspired together. The love we carry is the most special for it is a bond for Allah’s pleasure.

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Alhamdulillah, I also came across a few learned and mature sisters from whom I learnt about deen. They were my guide, well wishers and inspiration.

I learnt. I learnt what it means to be Muslim in true essence. I learnt that it is important to constantly improve. I learnt how important it is to be conscious of your sins and to repent over them. Indeed, guilt is a sign of imaan and a mercy of Allah (subhana wa ta’aala). I learnt it is important to attain knowledge and knowledge from right sources. How important it is to be obedient to Allah and how walking on His path keeps us guided and our life sorted. Understanding even bits of Quran is healing. I learnt that a believer never despairs and that no person ever escapes from the purview of our Maker.

Alhamdulillah, a sister introduced me to easier means of learning via applications in the play store. Audio apps of speakers and scholars! Learning could be fun and cheap!! Subhanallah. Gradually some speakers became my favourites and I found myself laughing while learning! The Magnificent Quran started getting a little more clear as a scholar narrated it into my mind. I came to know about this amazing thing called tafseer. I found myself standing in Uncle Scrooge’s locker, amidst the wealth of knowledge.

Then, I told my parents. Finally. I told them. Despite every hardship we went through, I know the fact that I was not the only one facing hard times. They were in turmoil too. Even though, there were times we thought differently, I know they are my heros! Even though I fail many a times to upkeep Islamic standards in behaving with them, they have not once failed in upkeeping their standards! Classy and sophisticated as always! 💜 Their hearts eased and more often than not, we have arrived on consensus on conflicting matters. Alhamdulillah. Who is the One who eases hearts? Who is the Manager of all our affairs? We here make dua, but things will be as they have to be. Indeed everything happens for our best. At present I am living with them and Alhamdulillah, have never felt more blessed to have these two beings as mine. (# please make dua for their guidance)

For the first time, I do not have a plan. I do not know what I will be doing next year or where I will be. I didn’t know last year that I would be here now! This year has brought with it unexpected moments. The year that went has brought me immense joy and learning Alhamdulillah. This year helped me sort the gems in my life and truly taught me the essence of life. Even though I don’t know what lies ahead, for the first time I am not scared. Alhamdulillah, the heart finds peace and it trusts Allah’s plan. We can strive but we cannot decide. In shaa Allah, whatever shall happen shall be the best for me.

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As Ramadhan starts, I feel very apprehensive. I see many revert sisters feeling the same apprehension. The apprehension of fasting with family around. I still haven’t told my family about fasting in the coming days and I only hope that they accept it with ease. I hope every sister of mine is able to keep every fast in the days to come. As I read innumerable posts about ‘easy meals for suhoor’, ‘Quran reading chart’, ‘Ramadhan targets’ etc., I feel sorry for sisters who are struggling with basic fasting. Indeed, we have to be kind to our parents. They do not know that fasting is the easiest in Ramadhan, that there is blessings in suhoor and so much barakah, that the heart is deep into ibadah this month, that there is so much peace and tranquility whilst fasting. From their eyes, it is their toddler (yes toddler!) at the risk of getting dehydrated in the harsh summers. Make dua and try speaking kindly (this is for me too). This is our jihad. In Shaa Allah, Allah will ease their hearts and our affairs.

Indeed, no one despairs of relief from Allah except the disbelieving people. (Surah Yusuf 12:87)

Subhanallah, this month is back again. I am looking forward to see how I change in the days to come. I hope and pray that each one of us grows to be a better Muslim and a true servant of Allah. I hope we become kinder, softer and more humble. I pray we repent to wash away all our sins, that He (subhana wa ta’aala) forgives us and that we store our ties of kinship. I pray that more and more people from humanity enter into the folds of Islam. I pray ease for all our brothers and sisters in ummah facing hard times, especially the likes in Gaza, Burma etc.

Please as you make dua this Ramadhan, remember me in a small moment. May you be rewarded with best in dunya and akhirah. May you have a rewardful Ramadhan and may we all meet in Jannatul firdous. Ameen 💜  💞  💞

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